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D a v i d a r i . c o m |
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Back in 1979 I was born. I grew up in a bedroom that was painted yellow. From what I remember, the walls were shiny. I had a rock that was the shape of a dinosaur egg. I don't remember what happened to it. A few years later we moved a couple miles away. My room was painted white. But then, I have to ask myself, was it really painted white, or was that how it came? Why are rooms always white when you buy a new house? If I was a builder I would paint each room a different color. If the buyer didn't like it, I would pretend I didn't speak English. Life in the new house was lonely and empty without my rock. I did have two windows though. The effects of the dreaded tetanus shot
The dream I had
So I have been meaning to tell you all something. I came to this realization a couple weeks back. I am a genius. It might be self proclaimed, but I wholeheartedly agree with myself. I was reminiscing about my Bar Mitzvah (10 years ago) and then correlated it with a couple lines from the movie Meet the Parents. When I was at Fleets purchasing my clothes for my Bar Mitzvah I was set on getting a green jacket. Everyone wanted me to get the Navy jacket. They didn't realize that I was a genius and that I wanted that to reflect through the color of my jacket. Here's the proof that I am a genius: Jack: That's an interesting color, did you pick it? Facts That You Just Could Not Possibly Know Here's a fact you probably don't know. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder are both androids. They were created through a joint venture by IBM and NASA. Not many people know this. Actually, I think I might be the only one that knows the truth. I am trying to spread the word. You should too. Tell your mom to go to www.davidari.com. You probably didn't know this one either: Brendan Fraser is a digitally animated character. You may think that when you see him in all those movies he is actually a real actor. Well, you are wrong. But who can forget Urine Trouble Man and Chess Piece Face. Old Stuff Ok. Fine. I will be more politically correct from now on. You happy. I hope so. I did it for you. Due to the bags and bags of fan mail I received regarding how great my website was, I have decided to grace everyone with some new crap to read to help pass your days. The Monkey on My Desk There's a monkey on my desk. He stares at me blankly for about 10 hours every day. Always raising the roof. I bet you that if he could talk he would want some bullet points thrown into this page. This is for you Mr. Monkey.
Well, it seems the page has come to an end. Wisi e nim admin im veniam, quis nostrud. In atsvulpate velt esse meleste at Check out Axe. semper manet sola. Ut lacreet dolore magna aliquam sic semper fi tyrannis erat volutpat. Wisi enim ad minim veniam. Fantasy Football. Dolore eu sata sfeugiat. Ipsum lorem vei illum sat dolor euis mod tincidunt vei auminiure dolor in esse. Schaad... how come you don't like my bulky images. Whats up with that. Ultaceet dolore magna si napi. Kevin has too much time on his hands. XXX Wisi e nim ad minim veniam, quis nos In a tsvulpate BBYO velt esse Fantasy NBA meleste at semper manet sola. UT lacreet dolore magna aliquam sic semp fi tyrannis erat volutpat. Wisi enim Brian and Mr. T ad minim veniam. Dolore My Cathy eu sata sfeugiat.
LANNIE: Our phones aren't working and I need to call
people and tell them tomorrow night is cancelled
There's only two songs in me, and I just wrote the third. My
apartment looks upside down from there. Stand on your own
head, for a change. Memo to Myself: I was born in a
lighthouse. I hope that I get old before I die. Alienation
is for the rich. When you are alone you are the cat, you're
the throne, you're an animal. I hear the wind blow. It seems
to say hello hello. You know you want to do it! Pop Pop. Pop
Pop Pop. Weird. |
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